How long before it's us?

[Mugwump]

[Mugwump]

DES MOINES, IOWA (The Borowitz Report)?Businessman Donald Trump?s failure to insult fellow G.O.P. hopeful John Kasich a full twenty-four hours after the Ohio governor entered the  2016 Presidential race has sent Trump?s poll numbers plummeting, as many supporters expressed a sudden loss of confidence in the real-estate mogul.

Trump?s Kasich gaffe occurred at a campaign rally in Des Moines on Wednesday, when the former reality-show star admitted that he did not yet know enough about the Ohio governor to properly insult him.

?I could get up here and call Kasich a loser, because my gut tells me that?s what he is, but you?ve come to expect something more special out of me,? Trump said. ?If you bear with me, I promise you that I?ll come up with a world-class insult that we can all be proud of.?

The audience reacted with stunned silence, leading some observers to question whether Trump?s failure to insult Kasich would turn from a mere gaffe into a full-blown scandal.

Carol Foyler, a Trump supporter who attended the Des Moines event, said that she still liked Trump because of the insults he had delivered in the past, but she acknowledged that her belief in him had been shaken.

?When you?re in the White House and that phone rings, you?ve got to be ready to insult someone right away,? she said.

[Mugwump]

GOP debate format....

NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)?The Republican National Committee has released the format for its first 2016 Presidential debate, to be broadcast by Fox News on August 6th:

1. Question from moderator to Donald Trump;

2. Ignoring of question by Donald Trump, followed by personal attack on Jeb Bush;

3. Feeble attempt at rebuttal by Jeb Bush;

4. Interruption by Donald Trump, followed by attack on other eight candidates on stage;

5. Attempted moderation by moderator;

6. Personal attack on moderator by Donald Trump, followed by gratuitous attack on Rick Santorum;

7. Reaction shot of stone-faced Rick Santorum, excluded from debate but sitting in audience;

8. Concluding statement by Donald Trump, including attack on Fox News? ?cheap-looking? debate set;

9. Demand for apology by Mexicans, veterans, China, Bobby Jindal?s mom, and other people attacked during debate by Donald Trump;

10. Donald Trump declared winner by Donald Trump.

[Ron Sower]

 

[BillT]

This is why Republicans look like a bunch of clowns:
(from some political joke website I lost track of; its a bit dated but still relevant)


Things Republicans Believe

Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

"Standing Tall for America" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican.

If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

HMOs and insurance companies have the interest of the public at heart.

Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

[Mugwump]

...good list there, Bill...

[BallAquatics]

This one is my favorite.....

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

We have to trade with China or they will stop giving us our allowance  LOL   See post #1

Dennis

[GraphicGr8s]

This one is my favorite.....

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

We have to trade with China or they will stop giving us our allowance  LOL   See post #1

Dennis

See post #10

[Mugwump]

This one is my favorite.....

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

We have to trade with China or they will stop giving us our allowance  LOL   See post #1

Dennis

See post #10

LOL....freak'n post code... ............10-4 

[GraphicGr8s]

This one is my favorite.....

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

We have to trade with China or they will stop giving us our allowance  LOL   See post #1

Dennis

See post #10

LOL....freak'n post code... ............10-4 

See post 19-3 subset b subset d subset c.

[Mugwump]

This one is my favorite.....

Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

We have to trade with China or they will stop giving us our allowance  LOL   See post #1

Dennis

See post #10

LOL....freak'n post code... ............10-4 

See post 19-3 subset b subset d subset c.

[Mugwump]

Ok...who's watching the debate??.....or are you waiting for the sounds bites afterwards on the news??.....

[BallAquatics]

I've been watching the chase.....

Dennis

[GraphicGr8s]

Watched it I did. Megyn Kelly is hot.

[BillT]

I watched it.

Kasich seemed to me the most normal and in a general election probably the most electable of both groups.
He and Santorum seem to be the only Republicans that really have any feeling for the non-rich.
Santorum is way too fire breathing religions for me.

I also liked Rand Paul's thing on privacy.

A lot of questions and answers were pretty shallow: right wing button pushing and applause lines.