random stuff

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Gun Control, It's Already Started...........

There was a bit of confusion at the Cabe's Sporting Goods store this morning.

When I was ready to pay for my purchases of gun powder and bullets the cashier said,

"Strip down, facing me."

Making a mental note to complain to the NRA about the gun control whackos running amok,

I did just as she had instructed.

When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring

to my credit card.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer!

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A driver is stuck in a traffic jam on the highway. Nothing is moving. Suddenly a man knocks on the window.

The driver rolls down the window and asks "What's going on?"

"Terrorists have kidnapped congress and are asking for a $10 million ransom. Otherwise, they will douse them with gasoline and set them on fire. We're going from car, taking up a collection."

The driver asks "How much is everyone giving, on average?"

The man replies "About a gallon."

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A Baptist pastor was presenting a children's sermon. During the sermon, he asked the children if they knew what the resurrection was. Now, asking questions during children's sermons is crucial, but at the same time, asking
children questions in front of a congregation can also be very dangerous.

Having asked the children if they knew the meaning of the resurrection, a little boy raised his hand. The pastor called on him and the little boy said, "I know that if you have a resurrection that lasts more than four
hours you are supposed to call the doctor."

It took over ten minutes for the congregation to settle down enough from their laughter for the worship service to be continued.

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[shatanka]

I see you got your motors up and running this morning...firing on all 5 cylinders too aye?  lol  Must have been that getting to bed early thing..either that or you had a lot of goooood coffee this morning! lol
JK..those are actually very interesting diagrams in action! Makes the dummies like me understand how things work better! Thank you!

And I just now read the jokes above! LMAO...loved the kitty one, the gun control one, the congress one brought a real chuckle. But, the child's version of "resurrection" was priceless!

Thanks for the morning funnies and items of interest to get the brain going!

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[PaulineMi]

That 5 pronged thing caught my attention. Fascinating to watch. Reminds me of my dance moves back in the day.  Lol.  JK. 

At first I wondered whet the heck are all those diagrams about. Finally my slow connection kicked in and shatanka's post caused it all to make sense.

[shatanka]

 "

That 5 pronged thing caught my attention. Fascinating to watch. Reminds me of my dance moves back in the day.  Lol.  JK. 

Ooooo, you must have been a great dancer to get moves like that! God, I would be luck to just dance anymore!

OMG, I had to lmao at that one with the man sleeping and the cat coming and batting him in the head. MY STUPID CAT DOES THAT TO ME ALL THE TIME! lol Well, she JUMPS on my head in my dead sleep and it feels like that anyway. WAKES YOU UP THINKING WHAT THE....and then you feel her making muffins on you and meowing. UGGG...kinda funny, but really QUITE ALARMING to wake up to! lol 

And hat seagull one coming and stealing the cat's food while he watched...PRICELESS!